Pushing Daisies
by sofatree123
Summary: Eli and Clare are changing each other's worlds already, and they're not even together yet... She's crying, he's screaming.
1. 1 Between Love And Hate

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters (as much as I would like to). They belong to them Degrassi folks (: (didja like my country talk?) **

Clare POV

Alli Bhandari, possibly the greatest friend a girl could have, stared up at me from under her thick, mascara-coated lashes.

"Clare. It's time for an intervention," she said, traces of disapproval in her voice.

"What does that mean?" I replied. Play it dumb, Clare. _Pray_ it's not about… _him._

Alli sighed, long and dramatic. "KC, you dummy. Jenna, the _vindictive_ little girl she is, is starting to scare him off. It's your turn now, girlfriend. Unless—" she paused to look over her shoulder and ended up smiling. _Deviously._ "Well, think of the devil, and he shall come! Look, Clare! It's our little friend Eli!"

Eli Goldsworthy, charming, snarky, and an awfully perfect amount of mysterious, turned toward us, surprise written on his face. His gaze landed on Alli, but then flitted to me. The corner of his mouth tilted upwards, but slammed down almost immediately, bending into a frown. He whipped his head around and walked briskly away. I swallowed, suddenly very nervous.

Alli squinted her eyes at me. "What happened to my two lovebirds, Clare?"

"Nothing," I mumbled under my breath. "And according to him, we aren't lovebirds."

She stopped in her tracks. "According to him? I haven't heard this one yet."

I looked back over my soldier. She raised one of her eyebrows questioningly. I bit down on my lip, hard, preparing myself to tell the tale.

"I told him I really liked him and that we should, you know, go out. I was just _so sure_ it was mutual. But then he apologized for—" I paused, choking up for a second. "—for _leading me on._"

"Oh, Clare," moaned Alli, at my side in a second. "Eli doesn't deserve you."

I pouted for a moment, trying to hold back the flood of tears building up inside my eyes. It was inevitable.

"I-I really thought he liked me! I mean, he sent me all t-these _signals._ But I was so wrong. I think Eli might… I'm afraid he hates me now!"

Alli pulled me into a hug, letting me whimper pitifully while the other students broke into streams around us, staring.

I felt a gentle pat on my shoulder.

"Thanks, Alli," I said. It was then that I realized: the hand was way too big to be hers.

"Hey Clare," greeted KC awkwardly. "Take it easy, alright?"

Over to my right, I saw Jenna Middleton sobbing into her locker. Originally, KC and I had been going out, but then he started cheating on me with her. By the looks of it, it hadn't been worth it.

_Was Eli worth it? _

I wiped my tears away and managed to grimace.

"Thanks, KC."


	2. 2 Bottle It Up

Eli POV

Auburn curls, fair, fair skin… I stared, completely entranced, at the concentrated figure in front of me.

"5w + 6 4w -2.5 + (-4w). What's with this easiness?" I heard her mutter under her breath. Clare Edwards: ever the model student. Before I knew what I was doing, there were doodles of a curly-headed, fair-skinned girl dominating my math homework.

I clutched my pencil harder, willing myself to think of Julia. Julia's limp body. She wasn't happy right now, _of course not._ Why should she be when her murderer was alive, not only free of charges, but ogling new girls as well? I let out a shuddery breath. In front of me, Clare stopped moving. I couldn't stay here another second… not without reaching out to touch that beautiful neck.

I bolted up, knocking over my chair with a clatter.

"Would somebody _please_ turn off that annoying heater? I can't—_freaking—_concentrate!" I screamed at the top of my lungs, causing thirty-six heads to shoot up and stare.

Adam Torres, best friend extraordinaire and tact genius, stood up immediately.

"Eli, I told you not to come to school while you're still sick! It's making you act stupid!" he cried, knowing perfectly well that I had not been sick for months.

I gritted my teeth. "Sorry." It was all I could manage to say.

"Eli, would you please pack up your stuff? Adam will escort you to the nurse's office. You can serve your detention tomorrow," replied Mrs. Dawes, flicking her pen back and forth worriedly.

"Thanks, Mrs. Dawes. I'll see you tomorrow." I stuffed my binder under my arm, ignoring the furtive glances that Clare was shooting me.

"Let's go, Eli," said Adam, ushering me out of the classroom hurriedly. Once we were out of earshot, he whispered at me. "Are you going to tell me what's going on or just leave me in the dark?"

I glared at him for a moment, then softened. I stopped to lean against a locker, only to leap off it again once I realized whose it was: Clare's.

"I like Clare… a lot."

"Yeah. And…?"

"I know Julia doesn't."

Now it was Adam's turn to stop. "Julia?" he asked. "Who's she?"

"She is…," I said, choking on the words. "She's my ex-girlfriend. The one I murdered." When Adam didn't interrupt me, I plowed on. "We had a really, _really_ nasty argument. I said… some pretty terrible things. She took off on her bike as fast she could go. She was in an accident. Died on the scene."

He looked at me, thinking what I knew: that wasn't all.

"She's following me, Adam," I whispered hoarsely. "She's angry because she's dead and I'm alive and happy and constantly wanting to grab Clare and kiss her."

"Do you still…" Adam paused, taking a deep breath. "Are you still in love with Julia?"

That question stopped me short. I had honestly never thought about it. I pictured her eyes, her nose, her lips. And my heart lurched. But not with desire—with guilt. Suddenly, Julia's brown eyes and dark skin were replaced by Clare's blue eyes and pale complexion.

"No," I said, for once with confidence. "No, man. It's been over a year."

"Then what's the deal?"

I look at him dead-on, straight in the eye.

"I'm not going to let Clare die by being with me."


End file.
